November 22, 2020

Despite the monochromic blue & grey, life (still) goes on

Oh, this ground feels so heavier
I am singing by myself
I just wanna be happier
Blue & Grey, BTS

It's November,
Slightly a bit more than a month before 2020 leaves us and we welcome the year 2021
To be honest, 
This year went through like a blur,
That passed by so fast and slow at the same time
It started with a lot of optimism, joy, and exciting plans,
(while at the same time noticing the looming mist of uncertainty as the pandemic news drifting in)
And suddenly we're all in a panic room, 
And I found myself on the ground, face flat with a blank mind,
Unable to even move, the darkness encroaching and suffocating,
Only God knows how desperate I was trying to breathe some air...

And I'm sure I was NOT the only one feeling that way.

What and who pulled me out of those black holes?
It took a long time to move again,
And it took a while to feel like myself again... 

What about you?

As we are left with a few more days before welcoming the new calendar year,
It may be time to start reflecting on how this year has affected us.
My questions to you are:

Have you been robbed of the year 2020?

If so, what are they? 

More importantly, did you gain anything else from what you’ve lost?

끝이 보이지 않아
출구가 있긴 할까
발이 떼지질 않아 않아 oh
잠시 두 눈을 감아
여기 내 손을 잡아
저 미래로 달아나자
There’s no end in sight
Is there a way out?
My feet refuse to move, oh
Close your eyes for a moment
Hold my hand
To that future, let’s run away
Life Goes On, BTS

November 17, 2020

Less Than 12 Hours Away

Hello,

Hi, I'm dropping by to say that I'm very nervous
For tomorrow and the next 3 days.
It's not just me I'm sure...
Too nervous to even think about what I want to wear for tomorrow

I've been dropping this to my personal journal the past few days
But it still doesn't take away the nerve-wrecking anxious feeling pre-exam 
And I don't want to bother people in my IG and Twitter list

So let me just engrave this here,
That, even after 19 years post-SPM (high school exit exam),
Even after 9 years of post-medical school exit exam,
And 3 years post-MMed part 1,
Exam still induces SVT-like palpitation,
Especially the clinical exam.

Wish us luck!