December 9, 2008

One week break

Surgery's over.
Now we're having a week's break before the 3rd posting begins. For me it'll be Paediatric.

Surgery's tiring. Really it was. Well, for me anyway. But I think I learned a lot from it- from the simple, trivial (or so we thought) stuff, to the complicated things.
At times, during rounds, I felt that I could do the housemen's job... we even compared notes during one of the night rounds and those kind of feelings left deep impression in me. Surgery taught me to be sensitive and observant. It reminded me that basic anatomy, physiology and pathology are important and I kept on wondering how I could convey this message to the juniors?

Weekends during Surgery were full with extra-curricular activities believe it or not- Sports Carnival (a supporter only this year though), Sunathon, HIP, Mercy's disaster simulation for World Food Programme...
My cousin's wedding marked the end of Surgery posting (with small morning tea that our group did for the surgery team and staff that morning) and now I can breath a relief sigh and let loose a bit this week.

I want the spirit of study smart, working hard and being proactive, aggressive (not aggressive as in aggressive in behaviour but in searching knowledge and improve skills) and motivated to stay with me until I achieve all my goals. This is my pledge at the moment.

We still have no internet connection at home. And that hinders me from jotting down my thoughts for surgery but I think everything's summarised up there.

The coming posting will totally be different... How different will it be? That's one thing that we have to wait and see but from other's experiences, it'll be a whole new adventure for us. I am currently preparing myself... mentally at that.
Hopefully it will go smoothly :)

November 1, 2008

Visiting Cycle

Visits checklist:
- Baby Balqis: done
- Baby Aufa: done
- Baby Aliya: done!

And the cycle will start again... oh, perhaps another one to be added in the checklist this December too? *^^*

October 27, 2008

Coming projects?

I was browsing through the old files of InterMed Games and YM 2 to be emailed to the other committees when I felt like jotting this down here.

Despite the fact that we were gathering at open houses, sitting on one table while eating, we still had the time to do small meetings about upcoming projects! In the end, this is the conclusion... that we may try to attempt to do these projects by the end of our 3rd Year:
- Le Tour de Kedah
- 2nd InterMedical Games
- Young Mercy 2's Symbiosis Camp in Perak (this is compulsary of course...)

Heart to Heart is being passed on to the juniors... I hope it will go well, better even.
It's my hope that this time around we'll be more organized since we learned a lot for the past projects. With everyone's scattered away though, that would be the biggest challenge. Let's work hard and pray that it will be a success to us, ne?!

P/s- We had visitors from childhood time last night (err.. or morning..) that evoked a feeling of 'Wow~ everyone's grown up now~~'. Thanks Sofa and Shibrah for dropping by!

Currently: Watching and reading Ryusei no Kizuna carefully. I'm doing personal review on them ^^

Eid Photos

Uploaded the Eid photos... click here (or click on My Picture Log icon above)

Some previews:

Group picture 2

Experimental shot

White flower

Two little girls

Oh... and this:

P/s- these were my happy moments... to be able to play with my lil bro's Nikon D60... More to come since there were two open house yesterday *wink*

October 26, 2008

Eid Mood Still

Jalan Raye series continues from last year but not as active.
2 houses last week and 3 houses this week, including our batch's open house on Friday night. The thing that touched me the most was when our specialists and houseman's visit during the batch's open house! She even brought the potato she promised!

Amal's one is relaxing this year. I guess because there weren't too many of us but we were able to stay longer this time. Not to forget the surprisingly duit raya at the end! :P
Another open house is tomorrow night, not counting in my aunt's one that is...
Pictures will be uploaded soon; I got the chance to play with my brother's DSLR and that was really satisfying! XD

On the other hand, Oct 24 will be another date that I'll remember now... News of newborns lightened my heart these days... it's really lovely to hear news of people getting married, getting pregnant and getting babies... Sometimes it makes me wonder if I've gotten that old... but then, maybe I'm the one behind the track?

Ok, that sentence just made me laughed out loud. I blamed it on the 'let's-build-family' atmosphere >.<

October 24, 2008

Clinic Week

This week our sub-group is in clinic.
Perhaps because after Eid last week, not so many people electively doing surgeries, when we're down in clinics this week and saw a lot of patients, I was quite happy.
It's a bit hard to clerk every patient though in clinics... but we did have teachings and some patients do have signs and symptoms so it was pretty exciting.

I haven't met my target of doing PR and dressings yet this week, so those will still be the aims for next week!

Despite the fact that we're in clinic (and that it starts around 8.30 to 9 a.m.), Amal and I still come at 7.30 in the morning. As usual, I was looking around for chances of blood taking (yeah, the vampire-mode is still on even to this stage). I hope by the end of this posting, I'd get to insert at least one branula too... (one je? :P)

During on-call last night, I was given the chance to do IM injection. And the next aim during on call is to spend more time in the casualties. I really feel I could be of some use in there.

Classes are packed this week. Long clinic on Monday and as the results, I had late lunch. Tuesday, Wednesday and Thursday, we had classes in the afternoon, so we were rushing and results were just snack lunch. After 4 months of symptoms free, my gastric attack came back.
That's the only setback this week, I guess.
Remind me to buy omeprazole/losec...

On the other hands a few good news this week- cousin's wife gave birth, open houses this weekends, news of a friend's getting pregnant, met a patient's daughter who actually knows a colleague... perhaps, going to shabu-shabu too for lunch on Sunday *happy*

p/s to myself- change main banner, have new pictures now don't I?

October 15, 2008


Surgery's starting! I like! ;)
I felt like the last group had set quite a high standard in the wards and with the teams so everyday when I go to the hospital at 7.15 a.m. I feel like I have to step up to that standard... a surge of adrenaline and at the moment, every morning's quite energetic... for me anyway.

Though I'm still orientating my thought process the surgical-way, I like how things are being done in this discipline... I wonder if I'll like surgery more than medicine? Back in Perth, I've enjoyed both but this time around, only day 3 in Surgery but I've enjoyed it already. Ok, so maybe even back then I enjoyed (vascular) surgery a lil bit more than medicine :P

Though the rounds are shorter, by the time I go home I'm flat. And that doesn't even take an account of on-calls yet!

Anyhow, surgery... I'm loving it!

October 11, 2008

Prank Call Warnings


My sister and I just received a prank call/scam and I thought we might just as well warn you guys about it.
It started with saying calling from hospital because our dad met an accident and that he's in surgery
A few non-sensible instructions followed, argue if you have to but DO NOT REVEAL any important information about you or your family!
It's hard to tell if it's a male or female, seemed like they use that device that could change your voice.

Applaud my sister for arguing with the caller; once he/she knew we made a phone call checking with our parents, he/she quickly put down the phone.

A few things he/she made us did:
  • Initially he/she made you switch off any means of communication i.e. phone, internet etc. so that it won't interfere with the electrical equipments once he/she connects the phone to our father. Get this people; surgeons DO bring handphones in operating theatre!
  • Also, he/she said our mom didn't want us to know yet, the hospital still calls us to let us know about the accident. Does it make sense that if your mom doesn't want you to know what happens and yet the hospital calls against her consent? It's just unethical to go against one's consent, hospitals WON'T do that!
  • And to send 'neurons' through phones? Get this too, neurons are CELLS in the brain, it CANNOT be PASSED through phone lines!
  • Also, he/she said it's a minor surgery (but the way they put it was like a life-threatening surgery. Be careful though, they said that his heartbeat was low (bradycardia) and it WAS in the range of bradycardia (maybe he/she gets the info from wiki?)
  • Another key to ponder is that they said it's an operation near knee-cap, but can't explain the name of the surgery or what structures have been severed
  • Plus he/she said it's an operation near the knee, but there's a 5% chance that my dad would be paralyzed... UNLESS it involves the spinal cord or fracture around the pelvic area, that just doesn't click. Knee is below the level that can cause both legs to be paralyzed!
  • The one that made my sister riled up and argued with the caller was the instruction that asked us to draw the curtain down and change into our parents clothes; so that the 'feelings' would be sent through the phone once they connected the phone to our dad... Just where in medical field does that stand? Hospitals also don't call patients' relatives to do 'rejuvination procedure' over the phone; there's NO such things, ok?
  • One last important point before I forgot; hospital won't simply call you WITHOUT introducing who is on the line (i.e. Dr. blablabla, pakar blablabla/MO/HO)
Seriously, be careful people... you'll never know what kind of information you'll reveal/offer once you heard the news saying your dad/mom had an accident.
Alhamdulillah we were fortunate before there's any instructions of wanting us to give bank account numbers, or transfer the money or before somebody actually break into our house during the phone call...

Ticking time

Alhamdulillah yesterday's paper was quite easy; though I got all wrong for 2nd question in SAQ because I misinterpreted it -_-;;

Surgery group organized Eid luncheon; which was really nice. Afterward, we had briefing with Mr. Ahmed regarding our new posting next week. I'm both excited and scared (and anxious too)... the way he described it combined with the way Hannan studied during that posting... I'm scared, to sum it up. Surgery in Perth was fun- of course, with the vascular team I see lots of veins in the legs and diabetic foot ulcers... of course it was fun (especially assisting with amputations >.<)
Here, Putrajaya Hospital is the centre for endocrine, so we'd get a lot of endocrine cases i.e. thyroid... also I think I'd be watching a lot more abdominal/general surgeries compared to back then.

Even from the way Mr. Ahmed speaks, he wants us to be proactive and aggressive (not in a bad way)... for that, I'm kinda anxious.

In CUCMS, the group doing Surgery would be the one in charged in organizing event for the whole batch, as an attempt to get the batch to gather once in every 2 months at least. Our group will take over the next gathering (the former group will have an Eid Open Day in 2 weeks time). There's a suggestion of us handling Le Tour (this time around, suggested venue is Kedah, hence, Le Tour de Kedah this time around).

However, most in our group didn't want to handle big event, wanting something light for the batch i.e. vacation plan... Trying to understand them (it will be a lot of work, yeah, I supposed) I couldn't help feeling a little disappointed... Le Tour wouldn't be called Le Tour if it's not for the community work. In the end, majority agreed for medical check ups but against the Sunathon... Well, majority won, so this round of Le Tour will probably be for medical check ups only I guess. Maybe the upcoming groups could handle Sunathon project.

For our Young Mercy, last night during our Profs' Open house, two big people had small meeting and decided that we definitely have to hold a group meeting next week. I suggested it to be at Prof's place since he's doing an open house so we'll just gather to discuss about our project there.
For the former one under us, we were told it's time to pass School Watching to juniors... I have yet to contact Mercy to let them know this... As much as I'd like to join the current School Watching, it's a school day on Monday and I don't know if the coordinator would let me off on that day...

Surgery's starting soon... It means I won't be around anymore too until I get to steal the time to be online.

But first, another Prof's open house tomorrow! (reminiscing on last year's Eid where we were on weekly basis of jalan raye...)

P/s- I emailed people in Perth but I rarely got an answer, which made me wonder... perhaps they're not interested in keeping in touch anymore? *shrugs*

October 9, 2008

I Miss...

It was a phone call that I've never expected, especially now
Now married, she's across the sea
She was one I admired when I was small,
Now we talk like more like friends, discussing more serious matters
At times both are like little kids,
sharing same interests, having the same relatives on both sides.

Back then, it was 5 of us,
During Eid in kampung, we
chatted endlessly or listening to our mothers' tales,
sharing plates during lunches and breakfasts,
into the large outside-bathroom (can it still be called bathroom?) we went when we were even smaller then...

Now one is in UK,
3 in KL, and one in Sabah...
And even the 3 of us in KL, now it's getting harder to hang around isn't it?
How time flies...

While talking to her on the phone, I realized one thing
I miss my cousin(s)

//Since the one in Manchester wasn't around, just pretend her place in mom's :p

October 8, 2008

1 more paper to go

Of all the examinations, I just have to get one that I really didn't want to do isn't it? Out of the many examinations, neuro is my weakness. It was a pretty straightforward case actually; since the beginning, my impression was dengue. But when he said it also came with bilateral leg weakness, my mind was on pause... Ok, so was that related, or was it not?
And since that moment, I knew I'd have to do neuro exam...

Nevermind that... one more paper to go.

And for some reason, I'm not really looking forward to Surgery next week...
Any tips to float my mood?

October 6, 2008


It makes me really nervous when Mr. Ahmed looked at me and tell me "You're supposed to be good" when he knows I'll be going to Surgery starting next week.

I'm having palpitations now...

(from where did he get the idea anyway?)

October 5, 2008

Unplanned Reunion?

The plan was to have lunch with Farah, it has been quite a while since we met and I still had to return her external hard disk. Afterwards we dropped by the pharmacist and was talking when I heard someone called my name. Not long after that, another unexpected pair turned up; it was like unplanned reunion.

But because it was unplanned, we couldn't stay and chat too long.

It sure does bring back old memories though. Now we're all walking our own path...

October 1, 2008

Eid Mubarak

Just a quick note:

Salam Aidilfitri... Eid Mubarak
Maaf Zahir Batin...

-Wani Z & family

(For those in Perth, I'll email you guys when I get the chance to do so within this week, insyaAllah)

September 28, 2008

Lapse of Time

After coming back from Haramain I said to myself I'd post new entries. But soon after that I was stuck with Electives (Aikido for some of us), overlapped with the new batch's Orientation and without a break, the start of 3rd Year.

Settling into the hospital setting, settling the house issues (which hasn't been settled yet, we still don't have internet connection at home), going back to KL almost every week just to do laundry, weddings invitations, extra classes in the hospital on Saturdays... With a blink of an eye it's already almost 2 months of Internal Medicine and Eid will be in a few days... Our exams too is just around the corner (the week after raya week that is)

Past 2 months, I guess it was kind of a journey. Towards the end, we didn't want to leave Internal Medicine; especially when you get patients like Opah and 'Tok and having specialists and consultants who were more than willing to teach us.

There are a few things I realized during this posting, especially yesterday when I asked one of the specialists regarding one patient I was assigned to; who had been transferred to ICU-
people always say doctors deal with patients' lives, it's heavy responsibilities hence every decision made should be done carefully.

That kind of heavy responsibility, you won't feel it until you deal with it.

So yesterday I kept on asking myself, is this the right line for me? Can I hold this much of responsibilities?

Then I remembered Prof was saying taqwa plays a role in our decision... We wouldn't know if our decision will be the right decision or not... but with taqwa, insyaAllah we would be guided to make a better decision.

I still feel there's something heavy being put on my shoulder as I take a step further now however...

July 12, 2008


I'll be away for the next 10-11 days
With that, I'd like to take the opportunity to apologize should I hurt you in any way
Please pray for my safe journey go and coming home and while I'm there


July 11, 2008


The house in KL wouldn't have many tenants unless we're on holidays or my dad has meeting in KL. Hence, once in a while when we check the letterbox, we'd find letters addressed to us- most of the time it's filled with junks.

I was about to throw away those junks when I noticed a while letter- addressed to me, complete with UWA logo on it.

Letter from UWA?

It's not good isn't it?
Reluctantly I tore it open.

My request for another year of leave of absence from MBBS programme there was approved and should I come back for 2009's Fourth Year, I'm to go for an interview with my achievements while I was on leave.


That was my first instinct. Tempted to go back to Perth and settle in where I was most comfortable with 2 years ago- riding trains to Fremantle Hospital, taking the Blue Cat to the city then walked to Royal Perth Hospital, walking around the main campus and dropped by my girlfriends' house, having talks on Charlie campus...
I'm lying if I said I don't miss those.

If I have the money, yeah, why not... after all this was like a vacation ain't it?
To walk into the interview room and tell them what I've done for the past almost one year-
there's so many things...
I'd tell about the SCTL system we're using,
I'd tell about Disaster and Relief Medicine,
About the PPD-military-style-camp in Terendak,
About how we go about our Basic Life Support and First Aid training,
About the visit in Air Disaster Unit and the disaster relief field exercise,
About Young Mercy and its various activities- health carnivals, jogathon, BLS School Tours, fund-raising activities, School Watching Workshops, banjir relief & community work missions...
About other extra co-curricular activities I was involved with- Student Council, Le Tour, Heart to Heart, InterMed, Orientations, Aikido, Kanvas drama production (ok, so I wasn't directly involved in this)
I'd love to tell about the Affective Domain, the mentoring system, the good relationship that we have with our lecturers
I'd smile and let them know that academically I'm doing better that I could've ever imagine, alhamdulillah even better than before...

I'd like to tell them that
And perhaps, this time around when I'm doing ward rounds in RPH, I'd perform better;
when I interview patients in Charlie, I'd understand better;
when I do examination, I'd be more confident...
To be able to greet my team with smile each morning... I'd love that

But reality is,
A dream is a dream
Perhaps Perth is a past for me
Or 10-years-time future, I don't know

But right now I'm here
'Here in my home... I'll tell you what it's all about...'
I'm here and this is my story-
from now on.

She clutched the white paper and looked at it longingly
Though it was tempting... though she was tempted
It wasn't a choice anymore
She was given the decision and she accepted it
Maybe there's no looking back
Only forward, the path left
Unwilling or not, she might just have to let it go

And the paper fell onto the floor...

July 9, 2008


Whoever said it's only there we will be tested?

The not-so-good news.
Last minute changes, change of plan, supposedly-impromptu traveling (?)
Lots of call, lots of favour,
The slight relieving news.
Rethinking, changes of plans again, back to original plan,
Maybe, slight change of plan...

Mind you I'm not complaining,
Just stating that anything could happen at any time

Sometimes (or many times) things don't always go the way we wanted
When it does, perhaps it's not exactly as we planned
And at times, it wouldn't happen at all

Maybe sometimes it diverted way different from what we were thinking
And maybe misfortunate (if that's how we interpret it) upon misfortunate pushes us till we can't breathe or think
But perhaps,
Perhaps there's a small path,
if we really seek, that would lead us to a greater relief.

[2:214] (But) do you think that you could enter paradise without having suffered like those (believers) who passed away before you?

[2:216] ...but it may well be that you hate a thing the while it is good for you, and it may well be that you love a thing the while it is bad for you: and God knows, whereas you do not know.

[2:286] God does not burden any human being with more than he is well able to bear: in his favour shall be whatever good he does, and against him whatever evil he does

So why the sour face when you can't get what you want?
What's up with the snappy remarks?
Can't you be more considerate?

This is another small part of life

July 8, 2008


Andai Amirul Mukminin masih ada,
Pasti terbela kehormatan ini,
Pasti ianya tidak akan berlaku,
Pasti keselamatan akan terjaga,
Pasti tertegaknya keadilan dan hukum Allah

Andai Amirul Mukminin masih ada...

July 7, 2008

Pampered no more...

Tired... Looking at the watch on the left wrist, shock flitted across her face.

9 p.m.?!

And we were still looking for houses..

I know I was being pampered back then, but the weight of that statement was only felt today when I have to look for my own accommodation, think about the public transportation (and you know how lousy the transportation here can be), think about how best to divide the given allowance- to high renting fees plus water, electric, phone and internet bills; not forgetting food and drinks. Oh, and perhaps the petrol price... which have also gone up now...

[Yeah, change our lifestyle, I know... less meals/'ikat perut' perhaps?
Why don't some other people change their lifestyle, like cutting back all the free cars and unnecessary advantages for example?
That would save everybody else a lot of trouble, we think]

How am I even going to save from that flimsy RM 500?

We officially don’t like looking around for houses to rent in Putrajaya- the unaffordable price (2k++ per month? Maybe even when we’re working, we couldn’t afford that kind of rent, hello?!), not to mention the annoying dead ends we kept end up in- what’s with the many dead ends anyway?

Back then all was easy peasy... half a year with foster family, 2 years in residential college, and another 2 years in very comfortable provided accommodation (mind you it was hotel apartment- fully furnished)- plus easy and reliable transportation (i.e. on time), provided meals (manjenye budak-budak overseas ni, I know) and paid bills... I knew of the downside being pampered like that. I wasn’t fond of the idea but well, people said ‘rezeki jangan ditolak’, right?

Or maybe, I just took things for granted, take things too easy since it’s there in front of my eyes...
Don’t we always do that?
And when we realized it, it’s too late.

As predicted, when the time comes to be independent in this small area of life-

I’m hopeless.

If you’re looking for a good investment, perhaps invest in a house in Putrajaya and let us students who’d be doing clinical postings in Serdang and Putrajaya Hospital rent it…

July 6, 2008


We were on the main road in Kuala Terengganu, coursing through the speed limit to visit my younger brother while waiting for the Friday prayer to finish. Suddenly my mom said.... "Look at these teenagers, 'performing' their Friday prayer on the road..." From each side, more and more motorcycles we saw passing by our car.

And the khutbah could still be heard via the loud speaker.

It's frustrating, to see that these are the sort of people who would perhaps lead the country in the future. The same scenario occurs in Sungai Petani, where my brother would always be the victim of my mom's lecture about if he behaves just like those who have no sense of responsibility at all.

And the other day, while we were heading back to KL and we passed by the mall that's nearing its finishing in Kerteh, each time, be it in the past when the signs were put for what the land would be used for till the moment while it's still on construction, we sighed.
Though it was supposed to be "the building of some modernization that people in Kerteh have never seen before", we still sigh with sadness...

Part of it to just imagine the suffering of small shop or mart around...
Poor become poorer...
Part of it just to imagine the number of students loitering around
Spending away their parents money (note that it's not even theirs to begin with)
Wasting away precious time for more beneficial activities
Doing nothing but staring around and chit-chatting their seconds down the drain

I asked again and again, "Is civilization being marked by high rise buildings and modern structures?"
"Is civilization something that we are working on when I see more people interested to appear in the t.v. instead of having the dream to learn the highest level possible?"

Didn't the history show that the peak and glory of civilization is when the people have the power over knowledge?

My theory is... teenagers could be the downfall of a civilization


Musing on some afternoons...
I don't want to wear white coats during rounds, or even in the hospital please.... Please... can I NOT wear it? No matter what people say, I still think there's no need to create "the white coat syndrome", there's no need to obviously state who we are, there's no need to indirectly give that aura of superior (when in reality that's just crap, in my opinion, but it does happen, doesn't it?)

Repeatedly I said this to my sister... I don't like it

And when the moments come for me to wear it, I know I will hate it

But what choice to I have?

July 2, 2008

Stop and Stare?

Among the topics discussed in D'Frontiers (our batch's YM group) at the moment are:
- housing arrangement: living with the new groupmates? find your own preferred housemates?
- where should we live? dengkil? desa pinggiran putra? putrajaya? sepang? isn't it easier finding a common area where most of us will be in? that way it's easier to organize activities and meetings
- should we personalize our white coats? does anyone have any preference?
- Basic Life Support school tour... PPIM Annual Summit in August...
- some tips before clinical school starts (you can contribute too if you want, it'd be much appreciated)
- anyone to volunteer as an SC member in the next election (I'm officially retiring, ppl, so forget it!)
- kebosanan melanda?

I guess some of us so used to have activities to run/organize each week that once we're given break, there'd be comments like 'I'm bored'.

I'm starting the new sem in mid-August with Internal Medicine (a.k.a. General Medicine or Medicine, depending on where you are) at Hosp. Putrajaya insyaAllah... and my muse will be in the same big group so that's not too bad ain't it?

Ah... My cousin's already engaged... walimah will be in December insyaAllah... and more and more wedding invitation came... I wished I could attend them all.
Bought papers today and I sighed.... Drama lagi? After a couple of pages, I dozed off... The drama in my dream was even more interesting.

July 1, 2008

We'll fly, sink and swim together

Yesterday we had OSCE... today, the results were announced. Fast isn't it?

Alhamdulillah after more than a month of struggle, tears, sweat, smile and laughters, we will step into another stage in August- congratulations to MBBS, Batch 2006... we've made it this far, let's continue our dreams tirelessly.

"A dear friend once said to me, “If you’re successful in the past, it does not mean that you are a successful person today. Your success in the past is history; if you want to succeed now, then YOU have to work hard now.” My friends, the principle is the same, if you think you are not successful enough today, that does not mean that tomorrow will be the same.

I’m sure a lot of us have heard that when we stumble, it is how fast can we pick ourselves up that matters the most...
Do not wait for someone to pick you up;
Do not look back and think “If only”...
Just look forward and take the first step, insyaAllah that is the first step to success."

That night, after the results were announced, we had a small kenduri kesyukuran at Prof. Hamdan's house... Perhaps, this is yet another small tradition of us in CUCMS.

Congrats, everyone! Looking forward to work with you guys in clinical years!

June 6, 2008

Yes? No?

People asked... we answered...
Some preferred to leave it alone... For that, thanks
Some showed concern... For that too, thanks
Reality sunk in... a very slow and delayed reaction for me
When thing like this happened, I do believe there's a greater good behind it,


Our reflections pass through our future today.

Without doubt it will come, so our hearts are projected.

The unchangeable promise is changing, into the wind, our dream is in hurry.

It exceeds far from expectation, reality is fairly tough.

Only repeating each day and buried with sadness.

I feel that I can go to it immediately no matter where it is.

When I come to a dead end I'll take a detour even if I lost sight of it.

Yes? No? each time we're lost.

Believe in My Heart...

Do I have to throw away my tired pride?

Do I rather stay quiet than to tell lies?

Can't you do it? Won't you do it?

Believe in Your Dream...

[Yo check my flow

The wind is blowing my hair.

For you and me,

I will cross over the wall.

Yes? (yes) No? (no)

Everyday is on reflection.

In addition to this Def soul (Def soul)

Let's go!!]

Shining Mind...

It's alright even if our footprints fade away.

Even if the streets become dirty in the middle of the rain, in this heart...

Away... I will never forget the place we used to laugh.

You are longing for tomorrow.

Our reflections pass through our future today.

Without doubt it will come, so our hearts are projected.

The unchangeable promise is changing, into the wind, our dream is in hurry...

[Yes? No? by Arashi]

June 4, 2008


It's weird... it's still weird no matter how much I try to convince myself... it's like it doesn't make any sense.

But reality is harsh, ne?

Maybe I'm still in denial stage?

June 3, 2008

Time flies by

Amidst going to college, trying to concentrate, having epigastric pain and some other things, time rushed through... Too fast...

Found some beautiful sound past weeks... and sticking with them till now.

Don't worry if you don't understand this entry... I just need some place to rant about... it's kinda hard to concentrate when you don't understand the message your body tries to send to you.

I'll upload report on our stage-play "Kanvas" as soon as I've uploaded the pictures in my flickr account...

Going to miss the cousin in the middle
If only Sabah's next door...

May 25, 2008

Report 4: Aikido Grading

Aikido Grading
Date: April 20th, Sunday at 2 p.m.
Venue: Aikido Yoshinkan Shudokan Dojo, Mines

I was hoping that we paid some workers to clear the tents up so that I could go home early on the night of the Carnival. As it turned out, we had some complication and the results, as you could see is that we cleared up the whole area (Shah Alam Health Carnival) by ourselves.

Nevertheless, Grading was still Grading and tired or not, we still had to go through it. Alhamdulillah, despite some mistakes I did, we passed 8th Kyuu and 7th Kyuu. It was nerve wrecking, no doubt about that especially when sensei circled you after you ‘kamae’ and such and judge you, but it wasn’t so bad if you know what you were doing, were alert and had practiced.

In May, we had 2 demonstration- one for the CUCMS Foudation Programme May '08 intake's orientation (we were introducing Aikido Club to the juniors) and another was public demonstration in OneBangsar during the launching of Am Beautiful by Am Assurance. I never thought I'd be that serious in this martial arts...

//During demo in Am Beautiful launching

May 21, 2008

Back in SP


After one week delaying going home, I'm now back in Sg. Petani... Home Sweet Home

...though the bliss is about to be broken soon- GrrRrr! It felt as though I'm working... like... I'm on much-needed break (hence the reason going home) and suddenly a few phone calls asking me back to Cyber by next week... Mou! I want more break!

Anyhow, the reason we're having break (a.k.a. SWOT VAC if I'm still in Perth) is because we're having our First Professional Exam starting June 20th till June 24th... (ala-ala Professional Exam kat RCSI & Trimester/Normal System 200 Exam kat UWA)

For someone who had transferred credit straight into 2nd Year into CUCMS, I AM nervous about it...

Well.... more reports to come... next will be Aikido Grading (though that has nothing to do with our student activities per se, it's still an important event this semester)

Report 3: Shah Alam Health Carnival

YM 2: Shah Alam Health Carnival
Date: April 19th, Saturday (7 a.m. – 7 p.m.)
Venue: Dataran Kemerdekaan, Shah Alam (behind PKNS/Library/Shah Alam Mosque)
More pictures at:

Perhaps I shall start by stating the reason behind the carnival. As part of Young Mercy syllabus, we are required to organize a Volunteer Awareness Programme (which basically meant a programme to create awareness in public) and at the same time making it a charity project to raise fund for our chosen organization/body. YM1 chose to donate part of their profit (and mind you they did raise quite an amount of money) to Pernim and the rest for their future project next year. We decided to use our profit for the 2 orphanages we visited in Perak earlier this year as part of our continuous effort with orphans. As for awareness programme, our Health Carnival centred around 3 most common modern ‘killers’ in Malaysia- Hypertension, Obesity and Diabetes.

And I’d firstly liked to thank and congratulate the higher committee of YM2 especially Eda and Anuar for their continuous and endless effort to make sure that the programme ran smoothly. It was indeed a huge success; with some members already at the site since Friday to set up the place and I myself went back to Cyber at 3 in the morning (and came back to Shah Alam at 7 a.m., a few hours after that for some rest/last minute job at home)

The day started with an aerobic session. What initially started off with only 30-40 people from an invited fitness group- 3 in 1 Fitness Group (who did weekly aerobic in Shah Alam) plus some of the YM members, turned out to be a mass aerobic session by mid-of-the session. We then had performances (gendang group, zapin, choral speaking, silat performance and nasyeeds) by invited schools around Shah Alam/KL. I think inviting schools to do their performances was a lot better than to invite/pay artists to come; for once, they’re on time and made no hassle...

Officiation by YB Halimah

Opening ceremony saw YB Dr. Halimah Ali, Selangor State Excutive Council Member officiated our carnival, followed by her speech and Prof. Ikram’s. Medical Check-Up (led by Zeti) had already began an hour before and so did the rest of the activities including Health Exhibition Booth (handled by Hannan, Randal and the gang); Aamir’s Khadani Boutique booth (and batik shows); booth selling foods/goods and promotional activities including Petronas Gas; basketball shooting trials & shooting football into goal; colouring contest and telematch for kids and open-participation treasure hunts (I know some Foundy, first year and silat people were enjoying themselves running around, looking for clues and whatnot). We also had health talk, CPR educational demonstration/training, lucky draw and AutoShow (run by Unimac?).

Special thanks to all our sponsors (MBSA, Petronas, An-Nur Specialist Hospital, Puteri Anwar Clinic, Syarikat Beras Faiza, Nestle, KPJ, Khadani Batik, Alam Flora (for cleaning up the area afterwards) and personal donors). Also another special thanks for the volunteers, our helpful first years in Medical Check-Up, kind volunteers from Medical Science Club from Management & Sciences University (MSU) and some of our dedicated colleagues from YM1. They really helped a lot. And not forgetting the doctors involved in Medical Check-Up consultations who would stay from morning till 6 in the evening!

Medical Check Up- doctor's consultation

I couldn’t even comment on every activities that were there because I myself was in charged of catering and multitasking with a bit of PC’s (Programme Coordinator) job… the ones that I got to go and try was a few food stalls, the batik-canting try and watched some performances. (I didn’t even get to see the cars displayed in AutoShow!)


But a few things for sure- the crowd was there, people were enjoying themselves (and I’m not just talking about us- the kids loved the colouring contest and telematch- I had parents coming asking where the booth was because their children wanted to participate), the autoshow was hot, medical check-up was full and BLS/CPR booth was swamped with people all the time.

Basic Life Support
Health Exhibition

However, I think the one memory that wasn’t simply replaceable was the moments after the Carnival- we stayed till 3 in the morning to dissemble the tents and sent everything back where they belonged (that means 3 trips to Seputeh from Shah Alam back and forth). The most touching part was that the commitment and voluntarism that YM1 members showed to us- that they stayed with us all the way till everything settled. The boys went home at 5 in the morning because they were the ones to follow the lorry to Seputeh.

The rest of the girls (and some boys) stayed to guard the rest of the stuff. Recalled I said that note how many tents YM1 had? Yeah, we had almost 15 tents- most were assembled by the boys themselves but at the end of it, we all stayed together till we formed the ‘human-chain’ in the middle of the road to load the tents on the lorry and cleaning up the area.

Cleaning up- Human Chain Series
Cleaning up- waiting for the lorry

Things were even a bit more complicated than it seemed because initially we had the whole road in the Dataran closed for ourselves but as night progressed, we were only left with one lane when cars started coming in and MBSA couldn’t do anything to stop the traffic.
In which then this astounded me a little as to the later the night sailed away, the more people seen around the Dataran. I guess for me, the confusing thing was they weren’t even doing anything except for parking their cars and sat by the road watching other people.

People could be weird when they wanted to, right?

May 18, 2008

Report 1 & 2

(I was thinking of writing it all in one go but that would definitely be a very long entry so I discarded the idea...)

1. Cyberjaya "Mesti Ambil Tahu" Carnival

Date: April 5th, Saturday

Venue: Community Club, Cyberjaya
Main activity organized:
Jogathon: Anuar & Eda (Person-in-charged)
Medical Check-Up: Nabil (Person-in-charged)

This was a side-project for us the Young Mercy Group 2 (YM2) apart from Minor Project (in college) to add income before our Major Project, the Shah Alam Health Carnival. Marshals and people for registration, traffic control and volunteers for Medical Check-Up were needed and we got some help from the first years and some YM1 members who voluntarily came to make this event a success. The whole carnival was organized by Cyberview but we were asked to handle the jogathon (yours truly was one of the traffic officer that morning) and in exchanged, we were given a room specifically for our free-service medical check-up. All budgets were sponsored by Cyberview.

I’d say the number of people participated (adults, teenagers and school children) were not too bad considering MMU was having a jogathon and event of their own and we were only given a week to promote the event and get as many people as possible.

Towards the end of the day, I got the first chance to do a corporate presentation about Young Mercy as a whole to Pharmaniaga- a nerve-wrecking experience initially but was one way for me to step forward another step in communication skills, I guess. But one thing for sure, we’ve cleared up any misconception about Young Mercy and in the end, that’s the most important thing.

Cyberview were quite happy with the event and our slot- that was good in spite the tiredness felt at the end of the day.

2. Young Mercy 1: Cyber-X
Date: April 6th, Sunday
Venue: Centaury Square, Cyberjaya
Main activities:
  • Booths selling food, clothing, jewelries etc.
  • Aman Palestine & Agensi Dadah Kebangsaan Booths & Presentation
  • Blood Donation
  • Futsal & Basketball Matches
  • K-9 Police demonstration
  • Paintball Shooting Range
  • Face-painting
  • Mini-concert by Altimet, Sky Juice Coffee etc.
Project Manager: Fizy

My sister was in YM1, so I came to help on the day. One would argue that this event wasn’t a real success. I wouldn’t agree to that I guess seeing at how most members were trying hard to make it a success- blood donation was a success, , the performance was awesome (Altimet was very cool & sporting!), the demo was educational and futsal competition was one of the main attractions despite the scorching hot day.

However, there were areas of improvement i.e. on the promotional side, the date and the chosen site. For someone whose first time to manage an event this big, Fizy and his ever-hardworking crew did a good job.

I enjoyed trying my best at the paintball shooting range (though my sister was obviously better than me), had fun letting Hannan’s sister, Bashirah painted my cheek, endlessly ate the ABC done by K.I and his crew, didn’t mind standing under the sun with my cousin to watch Altimet & the rest’s live performance and a little bit disappointed that I couldn’t donate my blood on that particular day.

YM1 borrowed most their tents for free from two places in Seputeh & Salak Selatan (I think); for that they had to load and return the equipments themselves. MPS had kindly lent their lorry so at the end of the day, all of us that were still there during the cleaning up dissembled the tents and later, some who were still there to help around sent them back to Seputeh.

Take note that YM1 borrowed 4 tents and to unload the metal bars and whatnot and kept them away in the storage place it took us (roughly around 12 people) till midnight to finish up the job. Even then, 2 cars went back after the first place which meant only 2 cars left to do the rest of the job. Regretfully our car took the wrong turn on the way to the second storage place, so we headed back to Cyberjaya afterwards.

//Blood donation

//Officiation by Tan Sri Johari Mat, CUCMS president, accompanied by Prof. Ikram, YM Coordinator

//Futsal Match


//Performance- Altimet's Cantik

//Aman Palestine Booth

//Cleaning up- dissembling the tents

//Group picture time!

//And off to work again- the beginning of human-chain-tents-dissembling series

It was a good thing that the next day was the starting of our one-week mid-semester break.
... Though it wasn’t a break for some of us in YM2 as we were back and forth from Cyberjaya/KL/PJ to Shah Alam and vice versa to do promotional and misc jobs for our own YM Volunteer Awareness & Fund-Raising Programme. Again I got the chance to do corporate presentation & introduce Young Mercy to Yayasan Kasih Sayang Malaysia.

May 7, 2008


Last Saturday's InterMedical Games 2008, first attempt of its kind organized by CUMCS marked the last activities by us the 2nd batch (2006 batch). As soon as it was over, I sighed a relief sigh- SWOT Vac i.e. study vacation starting next week would be the time to fully concentrate for our 1st Professional Exam.

Heart to Heart was also handed down to the juniors temporarily until we finish our exam; in which reconstruction to prepare them to take over the project would be done then.

I only have another programme- the May intake of Foundation 2008 students which will commence this Thursday up till Sunday and then my sister and I was thinking of going home for a week before coming back and start 'nerding' =P

Past 2 months saw us having programme/projects/student activities every weekend. We've proven we could do it and now it's time to prove that we excel in our studies too.

Please wait for another week when I'll list down all our activities for the past 2 months, yeah? *wink*

Visit to Air Disaster Unit in Kuala Lumpur International Airport (KLIA) as part of our learning issues in Disaster and Relief Medicine

April 16, 2008

Disaster and Relief Medicine & HEALTH CARNIVAL!

I love this course! During lectures I'd go like, "Ooh! I know this from National Geographic!"

Seriously, apart from Behavioural Sciences, Disaster and Relief Medicine is another subject that I enjoy too much at the moment.

At the moment we're having lectures instead of the usual SCTLs (Student Centered Team-Based Learning) on topics about disaster preparedness and basic disaster medicine information. Perhaps this is the best time to do School Watching, especially with the lectures this morning that touched on definitions of 'risks', 'hazards' and 'vulnerability'. At least we don't have to explain the terms again.

And we have 5 fourth year IIUM students with us in this course; them doing their elective with this course- kinda interesting ain't it?

Young Mercy Group 2's VAP (Volunteer Awareness Programme) and Fund-raising activity will take place this weekend. Info is as below:

Event: Health Carnival for Charity
Date: April 19th 2008, Saturday
Venue: Dataran Kemerdekaan, Shah Alam (near PKNS/Alam Sentral Plaza/State Library)
Time: 7 a.m. to 7 p.m.


  • Aerobics (7.30 a.m. to 8.30 a.m.)
  • Medical Check Ups (BMI, Blood Pressure, Glucose level and doctor's consultation if needed)
  • Health Exhibition on Diabetes, Obesity and Hypertension (included are quizzes for kids -with prizes-)
  • Auto Show!
  • Batik Show- special booth from Khadani Batik
  • Booths that sell food, drinks, clothes, ice-cream etc.
  • Colouring Contest for primary school children with prizes!
  • Tele-match
  • Treasure Hunt!
  • Basketball competition

Please spread the words around and DO COME on the day!
**Funds generated from this event will go to 2 orphanages we visited during our Le Tour de Perak earlier this year and for our next projects next year

*Correction: Banner said 6 a.m. to 6 p.m. but it's from 7 a.m. to 7 p.m.

March 17, 2008


6 years ago;
we met daily during classes that started at 8 a.m.; Then we went for lunch in Red Rooster, or sat underneath that lone tree and ate out packed lunch that we made ourselves.
Some of us went to the city, particularly the Alexander Library to study on the weekends, while another half chose to find solitary spot in Murdoch Library to do our discussion.
International Luncheon, Veledictory Dinner and College's Ball were part of us; we had 2 English teachers, 2 Maths teachers and a Science teacher whom all were like friends instead.

UWAFY_April Intake, 2002

5 years ago;

We resided in Currie Hall and Trinity College; and soon all in Currie Hall
We met on daily basis during lunches, dinners and breakfasts on weekends
Birthdays were occassional must events;
And we even went to the beach during end of summer, before school re-opened.

UWA_Currie Hall, 2003-3004

3 years ago;

We moved to Mounts Bay Apartments in Mounts Bay Road,
No longer common lunch hours, no longer common dinner time;
Occassionally we met when our Student Advisor paid us visits,
or on various outdoor activities, or when we bumped into each other on the streets downstairs or in the city, shopping

UWA_Mounts Bay Apartments, 2005-2006

Less were us in Fast Eddys
But once we gathered on the eve of Eid-Fitr
G20 was the meeting place.

2 years ago;
everyone went home- most are working now,
saved for one- who's still in Perth
and a few like me, who's still persuing our ambitions

And now;
We rarely meet- you guys travelled in work, or stationed in high-rise buildings;
I have schedule to follow; and Tini and Abadi are in Penang

We rarely meet nowadays
Until one of us called-

For important events like these:

Congrats Shila & Gundat! May Allah blessed the both of you as husband and wife

Congratulations, Zura! May you be happy beyond the day it's officially tied...

You... you who I've lost contact after you've settled in Sydney,
Now with a Masters, yeah?
And now you've come home,
And once more we chatted like sisters...

Congratulations, Shu! I'm glad you found someone who could cherish you ;)

We rarely meet now
Everyone's leading their own path
But occasional events like this
And these pictures of memories...
This is when we meet;


[Petronas, UEM, KPMG, CUCMS, PMC, UWA] (Ok, so the last one is not in M'sia...)

March 3, 2008

Defense Mechanism

We were irritated (and perhaps angry) at the fact that we could no longer park the car inside despite the fact that we live there. Well, who could blame us when we're just tennants and the landlord is away overseas and can't get the new sticker for us?

Despite the annoyance felt, we reasoned out that maybe the guards were just following orders (but if they were just more polite and nicer and more tactful in not letting us in, we wouldn't be just as angry towards them and the management as a whole).

So we found another place to park.

And despite the longer distance that we have to walk, I'm glad that we could still be laughing about it. Surrounded by the chilly night, we walked (and felt ridiculously funny with a big bag pack on my and Hannan's backs) towards the town villa with giggles and new resolutions.

I'm glad we chose "reaction formation" as our defense mechanism (Yeah people, I looked through Behavioural Sciences notes for this)

February 27, 2008


Sometimes it's frustrating,
When people say "Do something!"
"Change the system!"
"Solve the problem!"

And yet, they never give options and solutions...

Sometimes it's frustrating,
"You, this is your role"
"Don't worry, everything will work out in the end"

Yet, they never check the progression or the difficulties arise
And the next time during the discussion, they'll start blaming or questioning
Why is it not moving?

Sometimes it's frustrating,
When someone is too laidback
When time and time again you see the same people doing different jobs
When others are too selfish
When proactive is not in their dictionary
When you see some minds are shallow

And yet we declared to have first class mentality

Why don't we ask ourselves again... Are we, really?

February 24, 2008

The Road Not Taken

Does this sound familiar? Read on....

The Road Not Taken

TWO roads diverged in a yellow wood,
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
To where it bent in the undergrowth;

Then took the other, as just as fair,
And having perhaps the better claim,
Because it was grassy and wanted wear;
Though as for that the passing there
Had worn them really about the same,

And both that morning equally lay
In leaves no step had trodden black.
Oh, I kept the first for another day!
Yet knowing how way leads on to way,
I doubted if I should ever come back.

I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I—
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.

Robert Frost (1874–1963). Mountain Interval. 1920

February 23, 2008

Young Mercy 2 Projects' Promotion

Everyone's busy doing Young Mercy's (YM) projects, Heart 2 Heart and a few others that I feel like promoting what we're currently doing :D

1) Recycling Project: Boxes are placed around college area where aluminium, papers and plastic would be collected and sent for recycling. People are talking about Global Warming and sometimes you wonder what you can do, well, this is the time- every little effort means something, no matter how small it is!

2) Dedication Booth: Give your name and who you want to dedicate a chocolate/brownie and it will be sent to that person. Good to show how much you care for that person, a thank you gift and 'letter' for your logbook! You can also give it to your mentor, lecturers and other admin staffs!

3) Cookies/Cupcakes/Fruits selling: Buying while Donating- Buy yummy cookies, cute cupcakes and healthy fruits while donating!

4) Crosswords Puzzle: You think you know some of the hot issues on" Humanity, Medicine & the World"? Why don't you try solving the crossword puzzed. First place will get RM 50! Entrance are unlimited, you can send in as many entries as you want (note: RM 2 per entry)

5) YM Mechandise -Keychains and Mugs- Keychains and mugs with Young Mercy & CUCMS' logo on them; Good for momentos and gifts for other people

6) A Ringgit a Day: What more can I say about this? Just drop in a ringgit a day for charity and good causes!

For more pictures: Young Mercy 2 in Action!

*All funds generated from this small projects would go to:

  • 2 orphanages we visited in Perak (in Parit & Trong) during Le Tour de Perak
  • our Charity Health Day in April (details will be posted up later) and
  • for our future fundraising projects in Year 3

More posters & information would be up soon!

During discussions for progress of minor projects & 'Charity Health Day- "Modern Illnesses"' that will take place in April: